Here’s another example of a communication challenge that many of us face in today’s online world. Imagine you lead the development of a service or a product that your company produces, or you manage a strategic business initiative. If you are a responsible person and if you care about the result of your work, then it definitely occupies your thoughts for a significant amount of time during your day. Let’s say you work with a business stakeholder (David) who cares as equally about the result of your project and who has his own perspectives and inputs. The two of you have a good business relationship, and you trust each other as professionals.
At some point in time, you are in need of David’s advice. You call your business partner and get to his voice mailbox. You send him a text message, but there is no reaction. You approach David via email, and there is no response. Finally, you set up a video conference and wait online, even though you did not receive David’s acceptance. Then… a miracle happens and your partner shows up - friendly and constructive as always. You experience a great relief until the same challenge happens again.
And while you are texting, calling and emailing, you keep asking yourself: why? – Why is it so difficult for David to simply text back or acknowledge your email, or at least to accept the meeting invitation?
One day he calls you with a question. You pick up the phone right away and make yourself available. What is different between you and David, other than the fact that you are a better communicator?
The matter is of unequal significance of this communication for you and for David.
This does not necessarily mean that he does not care about you and your project. It only means that while he is your top priority contact, you could be priority number five on his list. For example, you manage one big program and he is your one and only business stakeholder; at the same time, he is the business lead on multiple programs, so he works with seven other project managers. Your priorities are clear, while David is always challenged with making his choices. This is similar to a “one-to-many” relationship in the relational databases.
What can you do in order to drive more attention to your project and to shift your business partner’s priorities?
Advice number one: always narrow down the question or topic. If your question is straight to the point, it is more likely to grab their attention and it sounds like an easy item to cross from their priority list – they will be more likely to address it. Indeed, if you say, “I wanted to meet with you to discuss the new requirements”, it sounds like more of a heavy task rather than “Do you think this feature should be implemented in the next release?”Once you engage David in the conversation, you can turn it into a discussion of the new requirements, but you need to win his attention first.
Advice number two: always setup a specific time for your discussion where applicable. If your business partner is unavailable, then you will reschedule, but you are more likely to receive their attention on a certain day at a certain time rather than “someday this week”.
Advice number three: show David that you care about his situation. Acknowledge that you understand he is busy and you will not take much of his time, but this question is really important and urgent.
Advice number four: do not call or email your business partner only when you need something. Try to establish a healthy working relationship, where you can talk about things other than work when time permits – your hobbies, your families, vacation plans, etc. Having a personal relationship improves your rating on their priority list.
And finally, here is advice number five: never get upset about insufficient attention. Instead, demonstrate your own responsiveness and punctuality. By observing your conduct, David will be intuitively getting better at his communication and attention to your questions and meetings.